I'm broke and stressed out with a broken spirit. I'm an adult now.

I have alot to say but I don't want to write about it right now. I'm stupidly poor right now. After paying rent and not even counting other bills, I'm uber poor. We're moving to a different apartment within our current apartment complex and I just thought it be easier than moving out but it's just as difficult in different ways. Honestly, I just don't make enough money to live here without college loans and scholarships.
 
I was doing really good with money, managing it properly and budgeting and shit but now that rent encompasses more than 45% of what I pull down a month, it makes things a little tight. I've had to help out Gary a couple of times and that bothered me a little bit but Gary is one of two people I would lend money to right now and I enjoy not being homeless.
 
I seriously just want to graduate now and move. I love my friends here but I feel it's going to be easier than moving here because I'm older and I know for sure that the friends I have now, will stay my friends for a long time. The kind of friends where I bend over backwards to be at their wedding and other important shit.

I guess I can finally declare myself an Adult now, with a capital A. While it does feel good to see the progress I have made from a year ago (Living in my parent's house working for my dad after flunking out of college) it's not getting any easier like I wish it was. I guess it won't get easy until I have a real Job using real Talent I have (I know I got alot of that).

I guess till then, It'll be like this. I'm not trying to sound mopey or self-pity, i'm just trying to have a dialogue of what's going on with me and how I feel about it. Except my girl troubles, everyone knows about that and I can't go into those without a protected post.